The Sasuke Whisperer
by nappyhead
Summary: Bringing Sasuke back from Orochimaru, Sasuke desperately wants to go back to that life. But one Anbu will have to train him out of this habit. Not funny coming from me.
1. Chapter 1

I had a sudden idea to do this when I was watching a marathon of the dog whisperer. Um right now i'm having trouble trying to make it funny. seems kinda serious for now but yeah...

* * *

The Sasuke Whisperer

"I'm glad Sasuke's back and all, but he's just getting out of control now," Naruto shook his head and sighed.

Sakura nodded as well.

Another day that Uchiha Sasuke _attempted_ to escape back to Orochimaru's hands. He had finally known where he belonged even if that 'where' was going to use his body and try to take over Konoha.

The infamous Uchiha Sasuke was lying on the ground staring up at Kakashi's leg propped up on the table. He listened to that familiar flipping of Come Come Paradise.

"You know Sasuke," his old sensei drawled out, "I'm surprised at you. Haven't you learned by now that once you're captured you can never escape? So why don't you just cool your little head off and settle down."

_Settle DOWN?_ In THIS Sasuke-fan invested village? Hell he might as well commit seppuku right now.

How'd Sasuke get to be lying on the floor you ask? As I once typed, he tried to escape during his training…until that bastard came, in Sasuke's eyes of course, Hyuuga Neji patrolling the grounds like a good little jounin.

Now he was forewarned to watch any sneakiness including a certain raven haired pole up his ass fellow and coming to the conclusion that this swift looking person looked like he was about to jump over Konoha's wall. This resulted in Neji happily doing his job of "catching" the runaway.

With a few little pokes here and there, Sasuke was certainly down for the count and unable to move his body much less defend himself. How could he lose after all those forbidden jutsu lessons from a snake sensei and with the Sharingan? He was too preoccupied wondering how he was going to get back into 'Orochimaru's blessings' again; and the thought of a girl free obsessed village; and that he had just snuck out of training with Naruto, using nearly three quarters of his charka because of Naruto somehow getting better or himself just getting out of the hospital three days ago.

He didn't know how it could've all gone wrong. Certain that anyone he knew wasn't going to detect him within the area of which he was supposed to make his escape. It was all Naruto's fault; he thought to himself, who else could it be? Fighting Naruto needs most if not all of your attention; a time consuming effort, and plus it is Naruto the dobe, he may be predictable most of the time but his surprises can be stunning. Stunning enough to lose track of his original plan…

'Damn that Naruto,' Sasuke glared at the leg some more.

--

She grabbed hold of the report, "Thank you…" the Godaime looked up at the mask, "Sambaso, you'll be notified of your next mission next week. You may leave."

The mask was of Sambaso, the third oldest man in kabuki theatre. The mask did not have much of the swirling striking lines for an animal, but showing the carving of a human. The wrinkles set high on the forehead, painted with the slightest touches of orange, the eyes in a happy mirth with an almost laughing smile, as if the face comes to greet his customers. The Sambaso will always be the first to make you welcome.

Sambaso's mask slight bobbed and left the room. Four other Anbu members appeared waiting for their leader to tell them the news.

"We," pausing, "have a week off. Don't waste the opportunity."

"Oh we won't captain," three of them chuckled.

"Hn whatever," making a sign to poof off.

"We should of celebrated first," glumly speaking, "Ah well, I'm off too," the Dog masked waved disappearing as well.

* * *

i'm still doing introductions and everything. -sigh- 


	2. Chapter 2

The Sasuke Whisperer

'Kuso! Took six fucking hours to get out of this position…I need to take a piss.'

Kakashi's leg was now out of the way and into his room for a quick nap or whatever Kakashi's hobbies were. Sasuke stood up, cracked his back, and hurriedly relieved himself.

It was about four in the afternoon already, should he escape again? No, not with his low chakra he couldn't. But at least he could get away from prying eyes of his annoying friends.

Sasuke immediately started heading back to his empty house. Jumping up on a roof, he headed home not wanting any confrontation in his moody state.

"Oi! Sasuke-teme what the hell are YOU doing out of Kakashi's house?! Huh!"

Sasuke sighed and turned around to face the orange dobe.

'Oh I dunno, going home?' he thought and said it aloud, hoping Naruto got smart enough to catch his sarcasm.

Naruto threw a finger at him, "I don't think so. I think you're gonna escape again! But you're not since I'm here to stop you!"

"Heh I was certain that _you_ didn't stop me this morning. I'm going home," Sasuke turned back around and started leaping off.

"Hey! Why you-" the blond haired kid caught up to him, remember only a quarter of chakra left, and grabbed him. "Oh no you don't. You're going back to Kaka-sensei's house right now!"

Getting tired of this bullshit, Sasuke slammed his open palm on Naruto's shoulder. He was an avenger, damn it, and he was going to avenge himself for being rudely grabbed.

Watching from atop of a chimney, 'this looked interesting.' Eating a cheese and tomato sandwich, 'Quite interesting, this Uchiha, in nearly his weakened state he still fights,' someone else jumped onto the roof.

It was a woman, with pink hair, Haruno Sakura the medic Nin in training. "Sasuke, for once, Naruto is right. We can't let you off on your own until we know you're not going to escape again. Why would you go back to that horrible place anyway?"

"Shut up."

Sakura jerked, "W-what?"

"I'm going home and I'm NOT going to escape." 'Tonight anyways.'

Naruto grabbed onto his arm and started pulling back, "You're home is at Kakashi's. We're not going to take the chance! No way in hell!"

The pent up energy, the failed plan, Naruto's interference. With a swift turn, Sasuke smacked Naruto and leapt off again.

"Grr! Sasuke-teme!" Naruto growled picking himself up and rubbing his cheek. "Where the hells Kakashi-sensei when we need him!?" and took off.

"Ah wait up!" Sakura, as always, last place to take action in the team.

Before you knew it, Naruto pulled out some kunais to throw at Sasuke. One nicked his shoulder, the others were blocked.

"Tch!" 'Damn them always getting in my way!' Sasuke thought.

'Hmm…wonder if I should do something about this,' thinking, watching the three headed this way, 'it isn't my business…' still thinking standing up. 'but I'm bored,' moving the mask back in place and jumping down to the lower roof and waited.

Naruto made his signs of replicating ten Naruto's and attacked/dog piled Sasuke. "Haha! We got you now!"

"Hmph! Dobe," he looked back, 'UGH!' he was suddenly slammed onto the ground. Something heavy on his throat, he tried to stab it with his kunai, gasping for air, a foot stepped on his wrist with the kunai held. Sasuke tried to look up seeing only the smiling mask of an Anbu.

"Naruto! Get up! Sasuke isn't there!" Sakura picked one of them up and pointed, "That anbu stopped him."

"Huh!" his copies disappeared and there was a log in Sasuke's place.

Sakura jumped five roofs before stopping to see that Sasuke wasn't moving with the figure's foot on his neck and the other on his wrist. "Get off of Sasuke-kun right now," she said lowly.

Seeing only the back of Sambaso, the figure looked back at her, "You're the ones that couldn't stop him so I did," removing the foot off of the boy's neck.

"Hee hee thanks Anbu guy!" Naruto thanked. "Ack! He looks dead!" he panicked, "We weren't suppose to kill him!"

"He is only unconscious," picking him up and tossing him over the shoulder, "But I shall take him to the Godaime, I see that he doesn't have proper supervision," and disappeared.

'Uh oh,' they both sweated.

* * *

So yeah, someone's in trouble. thanx for reading! ja 


	3. Chapter 3

Yes I know it sucks now but you're going to have to deal with it.

* * *

"Godaime."

"Yes," looking at three scrolls, busily writing, "Who wants to see me?"

"Sambaso has Uchiha Sasuke."

She perked up, "Oh? Send them in."

The assistant opened the door wider. Tsunade set down her pen, crossed her fingers together and set her chin there. They entered and Sambaso tossed the boy on the couch. He was still unconscious.

"Why did you bring him here? Isn't he supposed to be in Team 7's watch?" she asked.

"Apparently they are not very good babysitters."

"And you want me to…?"

"Find him a better sitter."

"Of course," she nodded, "And your opinion, who could that be?"

Naruto and Sakura slammed into the room, "Hehe Obaa-san, how you doin'?"

"You guys are not taking this seriously. Sakura I should've seen better from you," Tsunade remarked.

"But this was Kakashi's day to watch him," he whined. "And then I saw him on the roofs and chased after him! This guy," he glared at the Anbu, "got to him first."

"Well, you guys are removed from this task then. Tell that to Kakashi as well, he'll be glad to know that Sambaso will be taking your place."

"WHAT!" they both screamed.

This fellow, who they didn't know, was going to watch Sasuke? They didn't even know what he looked like! He could be Kabuto for all they know.

"I decline the offer Godaime," bowing.

"For what reason?"

"I've better things to do."

"Well now this'll be one of those 'better things to do.' Your new task will be to not only watch Uchiha Sasuke but to train him."

"…For the whole week?"

"Until he has…" Tsunade glanced at him, "stopped eating his own vomit."

"Sasuke would never eat his own vomit, that's disgusting!" Sakura interrupted.

Sambaso caught on, "I've heard he is sweet to drink but bitter to pay for. I'd rather not pay."

"He is worth the bitterness though, ne?" tilting her head smiling.

"It's hard to put thrown out water back into the container."

"Well then make sure you get a sponge then."

"But Sensei, we have more time to watch Sasuke than an Anbu," Sakura sweated.

"No it seems that you don't. You will have no contact whatsoever with Sasuke until he is properly tamed. Sambaso I hope that you'll cooperate with this."

"…Fine. Uchiha get up, we're going on a long walk," leaving the room.

'Eh?' the two looked towards the couch. They hadn't even noticed.

"…" he sat up and rubbed his neck before following the anbu.

* * *

I used some proverbs, "As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his folly." translating to Sasuke, he wants to go back to something disgusting like Orochimaru.

"It is sweet to drink but bitter to pay for": Having Sasuke around is great for Konoha as long as you can put up with his sorry ass attitude.

"Water thrown out is hard to put back into the container": it's going to be hard training a hard headed, independent, once gone to the dark side guy to not _want _to go back, put him back in Konoha as a container/cage.

hehe ja!


	4. Chapter 4

I don't care about christmas or new year's any more. but i do like getting presents.

* * *

Exiting the building they turned a right. Sasuke stared at the back of the Anbu called Sambaso.

"If you are worrying about your clothes and weapons, I've brought them over to my place already, seeing is how you're going to be staying for a long time. Heh. Just don't get used to it. I don't need a freeloader."

Sasuke could feel him smirking. He felt like teaching this guy a lesson for nearly strangling him to death and making a fool out of him in front of Naruto. He noticed that they were mazing around Konoha.

"Are we going to your place or not?"

"I can't take you to my place if you're still angry right? Suddenly shoving you into my place is just going to make you uh…have mixed feelings. Watching you in your previous, heh, situation, could you get any more hostile being put in an Anbu's care?" chuckling.

Hmm, it made sense to the Uchiha avenger.

"So…not angry anymore?"

Uchiha decided to not respond. He wasn't. Sambaso turned his head and continued walking.

"Good, getting tired waiting for you," back to their starting position at the Godaime's office went the opposite direction, leading Sasuke down a very familiar road.

Well look at that Kakashi's place, Sasuke was alarmed, do all Anbu's and ex-

Anbu's live together or what? Or was he going to bring him there instead? No. No. They went behind Kakashi's house, hopped the backyard fence, walk past that house and went to the house right next to it.

The house was as plain as his mansion, except it had more furniture, looking around taking his shoes off. He followed into the kitchen; Sambaso pulled out a chair for him, and started heating some water. Sasuke slowly sat down in it watching him pull out two cups from the cupboard and setting them down on the table.

"I've," tapping on his mask, "seen you around a lot before you have left with Orochimaru," deciding whether to take it off or not. "You used my hiding places often so I had to find new ones to use when all those little girls were chasing you."

Sasuke leered at him. Idle chatter? He wondered if he'll take off his mask any time soon. Sambaso got the teakettle off the stove and poured into the cups.

"Would you rather have green tea or tangerine orange tea?"

Still not responding.

"I'll pick for you then. It's still going to be used as fertilizer anyway," nodding over to the bamboo plants on the windowsill over the kitchen sink. Dunking the teabags in.

"You're room is right next to the kitchen just in case your hungry. Though I expect that you won't blow up the place while inside. My room is next to yours, the bathroom right across from mine, and then the living room. Your room has no window. I'll get the fan later for you," picking up his cup and sighing. Not a 'Why am I always burdened with this?' sigh but a peaceful home at last sigh. "Establishing the rules will be tomorrow morning," sipping.

This Sambaso seemed to be okay; at least he was trying to be pleasant, not like Kakashi. He'll keep his guard on a down low until these 'rules' were out in the open. But one thing was still bugging him, maybe a couple.

"Why?" Sasuke watched through the eyeholes of the mask look at him.

"Why what? Why I stopped you? Why I brought you to the Godaime instead of to Hatake's place? Why I agreed to train you? There is no real reason other than I was bored. Though I wanted to say that the Hyuuga's would be more appropriate for you at the Godaime's. I suppose I am just as good as them. Quite a high compliment. A change of pace is good for us shinobi's."

Uchiha finally tasted the tea, orange, it was okay. Once he finished, Sambaso took him over to the bathroom, "I still need to put the covers on the bed," and showed him the cold and hot knobs.

'What an unexpected turn of events,' Sasuke rubbed his throat, the water spraying his back, 'wonder what training this'll be? Besides not escaping, too easy,' he thought.

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thanks for reading for those that didn't quit at the first chapter. (bastards) i know i know, work on Relationship Skills, but this seems to be easy writing (the beginning anyway) suck it up. post a review or something and maybe I'll get the RS chappie up. (do threats work anyway?) ja 


	5. Chapter 5

More details okay, I can try to be more specific. Sasuke's ooc? (How ooc can he get? it's fanfic world what can you expect) I shouldn't get all emo since I don't comment fics till it gets really good. But I do like flamers now and then to keep ego down.

* * *

Morning…

Sasuke jolted awake looking around frantically. Oh yeah, this is his new prison, remembering last night. It was very warm in there, even the wooden floors didn't seem cold like his were every morning, but of course it was the windows. Windows tend to let the cold air outside seep into the room like it doesn't care that it's supposed to shut out the outside.

He quickly changed from his sleeping clothes to his everyday outfit, which exactly looked the same. It didn't occur to him that he already figured where his clothes were, getting used to this place already (?), grabbing his towel and opened the door.

There was Sambaso leaning against the wall, Sasuke looked at him, in Anbu uniform and that old man mask. He pushed himself off the wall, "Once you're done, kitchen," he walked away.

-Kitchen-

Sasuke entered the room and sat down, seeing the room with better light. Normal, clean, wall color pastel green. A normal bachelor pad. Sambaso walked in dropping a knapsack on the table, some metal clinked and shhked in the bag.

Sambaso, a feet taller than Sasuke, his dark hair matted with sleep, he tied it low and stretched.

"Hmm, guess we should start with those rules then. Number one; don't even try to run away. You can think about running but you'll know what'll happen. Two, your weapons," patting the bag, "will have to be checked in with me. Heh, meaning you'll have no weapons on you unless I give you one. If you, let's say happen to steal a weapon from someone, well then consequences will be dire and just. If you earn my trust, I might even let you go off by yourself at night, no weapons of course, that's number three. Four, I'm your superior so you'll only do what I say and no one else's even your former sensei. A suspicious mind is a healthy mind as I say," Sambaso chuckled. "Sounds like I'm a parent now. Rules will be made along the way. Now which teaching method would be most effective for the Uchiha?"

He turned around and opened the door, letting in the beginning of the rising sun. It was about only six am right now.

"Since you didn't try to run off last night; what you need is proper guidance. The simplest thing I can give you is EDA."

'…What's that supposed to mean?'

"Exercise, discipline, and affection." answering his thought.

'Affection?' he quirked his brow.

"Not in the way you're thinking, pervert. Anyways I know this'll be the _only_ training that'll get through your head. Come on, you're going to get some exercise."

Sasuke stood up, considering his weapons in the sack, he can exercise without weapons. Walking right past it… Sambaso locked up and faced Sasuke. He rubbed his hands together and clapped twice, his hands were a might dusty from..something, and continued to rub, "Now close your eyes."

Sasuke looked at the smiling face, down of his rubbing hands and back up again. Was he going to perform a jutsu? On _him_? Something was definitely up.

"Well? Were you not listening when I explained the rules?" Putting his hands in a sign position.

Sasuke disgruntled about the fact that he was going to do a jutsu and couldn't copy it.

"We're done. Let's go."

Eh? In one second, with one blink, he'd already done it? 'Okay this Anbu is quick.' Sambaso was already twenty feet away. What did he do? He felt a tug to follow and did since it wasn't a Genjutsu, he checked.

The two went a little bit past the training grounds about halfway to Konoha walls.

"We'll only do a light exercise today since disciplining you won't happen till I break you completely."

The avenger leered at Sambaso. Does this guy like to torture little boys or what? First roughly strangling him when they first met and now straight to his sick twisted pleasures? He might be even in more sick in the head then Orochimaru. (I wouldn't know since I stopped watching.)

"I'm kidding...but breaking you does sound like fun," Sambaso joked tossing him his katana-like Kusanagi to him.

Breaking him would be a pleasure to Sasuke as well…

--

"Get up. It's time to go home now," it being already eight o'clock. Pm. With nothing to eat since Kakashi's place yesterday morning, Sasuke was dead to the world.

But he wasn't going to let his new caretaker take him to the hospital or even worse think he's weak. And so shakily pushed himself up and rolled over and sat up.

"You're not bad," leaning against a tree, "for someone just out of the hospital. But of course, you're a ninja and an Uchiha must always be prepared. I think you'll do well on your first assignment tomorrow."

Walking over to him he pulled Sasuke up and threw an arm over his shoulder. A seven am to eight pm nonstop workout was a _light_ exercise? Even Sasuke knew how to take breaks. His limits.

But he was better company, that's for sure.

* * *

chap 5 done. next? haven't started on that, time to unleash the leash? hmm! look at the time 2:57am, no wonder I worked so well. lol. thanx for reading. Ja! (I'm so not japanese lol) 


	6. Nepotism

I'm in a good mood to update

* * *

Second day of the coming 

"Back into bandages, tsk tsk tsk," wrapping his forearm. "You're still not skipping out of this assignment though. Too bad for you." And slapped his arm really hard.

"Hn!" 'Bastard.' tentatively touching his arm.

Once again they set out through the kitchen door and went to the Konoha Military Police station. They were across the street from the station. Sasuke hasn't seen this place in years.

"You know…wait you don't know. Besides this place being founded and used to run by the Uchihas' a decade ago, they sure were nepotistical. I was quite jealous when I found out only members from your clan could be in the police force. Though it was a good thing I wasn't born one too, or else I would be dead haha. Bad joke. Let's check you in," setting a hand on Sasuke's shoulder.

They crossed the street and walked up the steps. Sambaso pulled open the door for Sasuke.

The regular run of the mill small time thieves and murderers were being pushed about the place. So what was Sambaso up to? Up at the counter, a clerk handed them a folder. Sambaso opened the folder and checked its contents. Nodding, he pulled out an envelope from his vest and handed it to the clerk.

From Sasuke's view, the envelope was very thick looking. Sambaso walked right out.

"What are we doing?" he finally speaks aloud.

"Police work, just going to search a house for drugs," slapping the folder on Uchiha's chest. "Let's roll," poofing both of them in front of an apartment complex.

Banging on the door of apartment number 696, they heard some scuffling inside and a crash.

Sasuke looked at Sambaso looking at his watch. Now what the hell is he doing?

"I feel generous today so I gave him two minutes to get out of the place before hunting him down. Good prey is so hard to find."

Time slowed by as more banging and the opening of a window went through the thin door. He couldn't believe they're not after him yet! Uchiha was itching for a chase, for this was Konoha, nothing else exciting was going to happen in this goody two shoes village.

"…two point five, one," and kicked the door open. "Hm, drugs are usually hiding …where?" slowly entering the place.

First to make a move, Sasuke checked the rooms and founded a guy trying to get back in the window.

"Hey dude!" he whispered loudly, "Hand me those bags, will ya?"

Looking at his eyes and the violently shaking of his hands, Sasuke inspected that this man was on drugs.

"Sasuke quit running off. You'll step on a knife someday," Sambaso called out, "Come back in here. Now."

"I've got him," he called back grabbing the junkie by the arm, falling onto the bathroom grungy tiles.

"No you don't. Come in here!"

He felt a tingling sensation around his neck, Sasuke just rubbed it probably a neck ache from that choke hold from Sambaso. Then suddenly he was pulled back, now he too was on the floor being dragged back, like a rope was around his neck. Breathing was getting harder for him as he began to leave the bathroom.

Sasuke watched the man get up, grab his drugs, and leave the bathroom, "See ya!"

Turning the corner, he started to struggle, and the more he struggled the more he couldn't breathe. Finally it seemed the restraint loosened and stopped dragging him at the kitchen.

Sambaso standing over his head, "You know you should listen to your superior when I tell you to come."

Sasuke's eyes widened as he spotted a silver lining wrapped around Sambaso's hand and around his own neck.

"What the hell!"

"Quit overreacting," he tugged the string.

He choked sitting up, coughing, "This is a fucking leash!"

"And all you keep doing is struggling like a dog. Quit acting like one and I'll stop tugging."

"He's getting away!" Sasuke attempted to cut the leash right off. It wouldn't break.

"Sorry can't get out of this jutsu until you're in a calm submissive state. Then you can catch the crack head. He's only sixty feet away. I figured patience was a virtue for you. Why can't you cut back? _You_ know you can catch him. He's just a lowly bug, how far can he get away with you catching him? Enjoy it a little; you know what you're up against. A hundred twenty one feet away. So you're not going to rush in now?"

Sasuke was fingering the fine line, like for fishing, he stood up.

"Okay now you can catch him," he nodded.

Sasuke was gone in a flash.

"Didn't I say take it easy?" he shook his head and looked up. "Hmm, did I feed him today? …Or yesterday?"

* * *

Nepotistical / Nepotism – Favoring in hiring your own family and friends. Like the Godfather and mafia. hehe, I like Sasuke cussing. thanks for reading 


	7. Chapter 7

updated/deleted: Sorry I slept over for two weeks and made my sister put this chapter out. She messed up

* * *

"See don't you feel better now?" Sambaso watched him drop the guy on the ground before him, like a cat giving his master a mouse. Touching, wasn't it?

He was feeling his neck of any evidence of the leash. Nothing. Just his skin. An illusion? He was certain there was something there before he left.

"Well we're done for today. Let's go home. Got to reward you for your first lesson," grabbing the body.

--

Sasuke watched in hunger as Sambaso filled up a bowl with rice. He was starving; his stomach wasn't going to try lie, and thought it was all worth it if he could have that one bowl of rice.

Sambaso held up the bowl in one hand while he searched for something in the fridge, "I don't know what we could have with this." Oh the pain, Sasuke didn't care for any side dishes! There's always soy sauce!

I know, how about some eggs?" talking to himself and pushing the door close with his foot, with five eggs in his hand. "Hmm, I should start planning what to eat too, then." A pan already out, setting the eggs down, turning up the heat, cracked each egg, and dumped some sausages in the pan as well.

By the time he was done preparing, Sasuke was salivating from the smell. Sambaso set the bowl and the plate down in front of him and finally the chopsticks. Sasuke picked up the chopsticks and was right about to dig in until he looked up, waiting.

Through the open smile you could see the huge smile, "Ah now you see! Yes, go ahead and eat!" slapping his back. Sasuke finished his bowl and shot out his arm for another refill. His request was fulfilled, he hunched over staring at his bowl as if about to breathe it in, if he wasn't himself he would cry but let the steam burn his eyes from doing so.

"And affection. This is my affection towards you," filling up the bowl for the fourth time. "Have some more, clean up, and you're done for the day. I've got unfinished business to do."

Mouth-filled Sasuke watched him walk out pulling out his ponytail and…loosening his mask? Yep, and continued watching the gloved hand pull the mask DOWN and turn the corner. This guy had a face after all, gulping down his eggs, might be an easier challenge to find out what he looks like than Kakashi.

The idea of chasing after his real face was immature yes when all he could do was ask. But he wouldn't, trying this game with Kakashi; I'd think he learned his lesson. Sasuke finished the four cups of rice and five scrambled eggs and washed up. The thought of escaping popped in his mind while brushing his teeth but that quickly passed, with the hint of a noose around his neck, he didn't think he'd get far.

There was nothing else to do being stuffed and tired but think of his new foster parent. Like what he did on his spare time. What is his problem? (Cause you know how everyone in Konoha has problems) How his childhood was like? Age? Real name? And etc.

On the usual weekday night, what would he be doing? Thinking of finishing moves to kill Itachi, Naruto, Gaara, Kakashi, the usual oppositions. Ways on getting stronger without Orochimaru's help. So why couldn't he think about any of those things now? Hell if I knew.

One thing was for sure, there was something about Sambaso that put him off. He was too tired to get out of bed and fell asleep on this.

…Third Morning

Five am. Wake up. Five o two, get out of bed. Ten second stretching, a minute to change his clothes, and two seconds to grab his towel on the way out. Finishing his bathroom duties, he opened his bedroom door, tossing the towel on his bed, and closed it.

He stopped at the sight before him; there was a woman in the kitchen and it appeared to him with her back to him facing the stove, that she was making breakfast. 'This must be Sambaso's unfinished business then,' Sasuke thought sitting down at the table watching her.

Her back profile: about the height of Sambaso, wearing yellow shorts and a blue tee barefooted, and her dark blue hair reached her shoulders in a loose tie.

When she turned around, her face was no beauty, just average. She must have had some good qualities to overlook that besides the toned body. Her eyes settled on him, "Looks like it's going to be a sunny day yeah?"

Dumping the pans contents onto a plate, she skidded the plate in front of him.

"You're curious…about me. Ask whatever you're thinking," smiling down at him seeing how this'll be interesting.

Pulled out a chair and leaned her head on her knee she put up. She studied his face carefully; pushing the syrup bottle towards him for his pancakes. Sasuke stared back.

Sasuke had nothing to lose so he did, "What's you name?"

"Quilin Eimi, just call me Eimi."

He leaned back and started to knife his pancakes, "What is your relation to him?" Casually said.

"Him?"

"Sambaso."

"The gardener, just water his plants whenever he's out," shrugging.

"How old is he?"

"Twenty five, he's pretty young. Ah to be young and carefree," smiling.

"His real name?"

"Ah finally getting to the main question," looking at him with a lifted eyebrow, "Maybe I shouldn't tell you," thinking about it and rubbing her chin.

He shrugged, it didn't really matter, "Does he ever take off that mask?"

"Off days like today he should be."

Still, "What does he look like?" realizing there were no pictures around.

Eimi showed her teeth, "You're looking at it."

Now it was his turn to lift a brow, "…Twins."

"You can call it that if you want," lifting her hand up, Sambaso's mask appeared to drop in her hand and lifted it to her face, "But I'll just say shadow clone jutsu."

Her voice sounded exactly like his. "You're him."

"Or he's me and I must really resemble a man in my uniform. A name is but a word associated to a face," pulling the mask halfway down to show her purple eyes, "This is a secret you must keep. A direct order."

Still not believing it being single handedly whipped by a woman. "Our first meeting?"

"On a roof where you ran into my hand and basically choked yourself while I pushed you on the floor. And then one foot on your wrist and the other on your neck."

"Which are you?" he wished he never started asking questions.

"Whichever makes you feel more comfortable with. Doesn't matter, I'm not wasting a whole lot of chakra, and I'm still going to treat you the same."

"The real one then."

Nodding Eimi, "Okay then. Done? Wait outside then while I get dressed."

Sasuke had forgotten to ask about the silver lining around his neck whenever he disobeyed.

S/He changed into a black long sleeved turtle neck and slacks, with some orange shades on her eyes. You couldn't really tell if s/he were really a wo/man.

"And what about that jutsu the first morning?" he asked.

"That jutsu is quite simple to do, though I'm not going to show you how it's done," and then whispered, "You might do something stupid like teenagers and sex or drugs, you know."

It looked like there weren't going to be doing much today, which was good because he was still kind of sore and worn out from the first two days. So Eimi opened up to him, I guess that gives some reason to be more cordial and open back to her.

"What was the point of dressing like a guy?"

They were walking and talking, "There are a few women in squads, sadly most go in the medical field, it just so happened my first anbu team was all men and dense as they want to be finally figured my gender on the fifth mission."

She chuckled, "Hurt my pride for a few seconds till I just thought it better to be a man in their eyes. A simple henge no jutsu, I joked about my gender, and fell for it. Well Mutt got it quickly but kept his mouth shut."

They were at a bookstore now, Eimi opening the door for him, "Why am I telling you my life history to you anyway?...hmm I forgot. I'll tell you later if I remember."


End file.
